The Quintessential Pat Robertson

"Feminism encourages women to leave their husbands, kill their children, practice witchcraft, destroy capitalism and become lesbians."

Excellent.  Makes me glad that I bought this magnetic bumper sticker, currently on my car: 'Sorry I wasn't in church on Sunday.  I was busy practicing witchcraft and becoming a lesbian'.

"If I could just get a nuclear device inside Foggy Bottom, I think that's the answer."  [In reference to the US State Department in Washington, DC]

How does Pat Robertson get away with threatening to nuke the State Department in a post 9/11 climate?  Could this, finally, be the 'mushroom cloud' about which Condi Rice opined??

"Just like what Nazi Germany did to the Jews, so liberal America is now doing to the evangelical Christians. It's no different. It is the same thing. It is happening all over again. It is the Democratic Congress, the liberal-based media and the homosexuals who want to destroy the Christians. Wholesale abuse and discrimination and the worst bigotry directed toward any group in America today. More terrible than anything suffered by any minority in history."

Ok - so... evangelical Christians are now like the Jews... And all other Christians (non-evangelical) and everyone else of a different faith or no faith at all are like the Nazis... Apparently, then, some hybrid of Andrew Sullivan and Wolf Blitzer will play the role of Hitler...

"New Orleans asked for this tragedy [Hurricane Katrina] by advertising itself as a destination for jazz music. As every Christian knows, jazz music is sinful and lures people into eternal damnation."

Hm.  All right then - so Biloxi, which advertises itself as a destination for gambling was hit because jazz is a bigger sin or...?

"In order to make clear His anger is directed at [Ellen Degeneres], God will create an earthquake whose epicenter is directly below the stage where Ms. Degenerate is hosting her show at that moment. The guests, crew, and audience at such an event will likely perish, but since many of those people are likely sexual deviants and the rest choose to associate themselves with homosexuals, they are hardly innocents."

1.. 2.. 3.. 4.. who is it that we adore?  5.. 6.. 7.. 8.. only those who deviate!

"Now, the Supreme Court has declared a constitutional right to consensual sodomy and, by the language in its decision, has opened the door to homosexual marriages, bigamy, legalized prostitution, and even incest. (snip)  Would you join with me and many others in crying out to our Lord to change the Court?  If we fast and pray and earnestly seek God's face, then He will hear our prayer and give us relief.  One justice is 83 years old, another has cancer, and another has a heart condition. Would it not be possible for God to put it in the minds of these three judges that the time has come to retire?"

Too bad one of the not-sick ones decided to pack it in first.

"Presbyterians are the spirit of the Antichrist."

What about Catholics?  Unitarians?

"There is no such thing as separation of church and state in the Constitution. It is a lie of the Left and we are not going to take it anymore."

You got that right - there IS no such thing as a separation of church and state... any longer.

"You know, I don't know about this doctrine of assassination, but if [President Hugo Chavez of Venezuela] thinks we're trying to assassinate him, I think that we really ought to go ahead and do it. It's a whole lot cheaper than starting a war. And I don't think any oil shipments will stop... We have the ability to take him out, and I think the time has come that we exercise that ability. We don't need another $200 billion war to get rid of one, you know, strong-arm dictator. It's a whole lot easier to have some of the covert operatives do the job and then get it over with."

Well... As long as oil shipments don't stop... Then all right.

"You say you're supposed to be nice to the Episcopalians and the Presbyterians and the Methodists and this, that, and the other thing. Nonsense, I don't have to be nice to the spirit of the Antichrist."

BUT WHAT ABOUT THE CATHOLICS AND UNITARIANS??

"I'd like to say to the good citizens of Dover: if there is a disaster in your area, don't turn to God, you just rejected Him from your city... And don't wonder why He hasn't helped you when problems begin, if they begin. I'm not saying they will, but if they do, just remember, you just voted God out of your city. And if that's the case, don't ask for His help because he might not be there." [responding to the overthrow of the entire school board, which had supported the teaching of intelligent design]

He's just sayin'.

All quotes but the last come from here.  The last quote is a news item of today and can be found here.

What a douchebag this guy is.  I don't know whether I want him to just shut up or talk a lot more and a lot louder so everyone will see what a douchebag he is.

posted by RenaRF at 10:24 AM 4 comments